Why why why?

This Friday is the day when I will move out into the woods and I have to admit that I am currently not looking forward to it one bit. You see I have got rather used to some of the trappings of modern life, not just the obvious things life television (albeit in a language I don't understand) and wardrobes with their ability to keep clothes to hand rather than having to rummage around in a bag for the things. I am embarrassed to admit that I have also grown accustomed to, comfort, being clean, running water, shelter, warmth being dry and not having slugs eating all my possessions. As much as I enjoyed going out in the woods in Italy it seems that I enjoyed the coming home, having a shower and getting into a bed with a mattress made out of proper mattress making stuff rather than a collection of leaves and twigs. Furthermore, my girlfriend, Mrs Ditchmonkey, is moving out here to Switzerland in July and will be borrowing my apartment for the summer. She has the good fortune of having a long summer holiday before taking up employment here in Switzerland in September and has informed me she intends to spend it reading, sitting in cafès and wearing summer dresses. At no point in this description does there appear to be space for lugging a backpack up and down mountains, spending evenings being bitten my mosquitoes or sleeping in a ditch. So my apartment full of the comforts of modern life and a pretty girl to whom I grown rather attached will be in the village whilst I sleep on the side of a mountain. I have analysed this situation from all angles and can see no sense in it. On reflection there are a great many things that could be said not to be sensible about living above a ski resort without a tent for a year. Ho Hum.

Unless there are any last minute setbacks I will move out to the woods on Friday.