Monday, 20 February 2006

Three is the Magic Number, discuss.

Back in the day De La Soul proclaimed three to be the magic number, and few have had cause to argue. However, a closer look at the facts shows that in fact Two is a far superior number and that the further from Two that we get the worse the situation becomes. Take for example some of the best things in life. Strawberries and cream, bacon and eggs, Simon and Garfunkle, M and M, Gin and Tonic, sublime combinations all and the secret lies in the simplicity of the blend. Compare these, if you will, with the following combinations; bacon eggs and jam; Dave, Dee, Dozy, Grumpy, Beaky, Mick and Titch or even Gin, Tonic, Beer Whiskey, Kebab and a fight. We can clearly see that the second list is in no way to be compared favourably with the first but what is it that unifies the second list? They all contain a number of items greater than two and from this we can extrapolate that any combination greater than Two, for example Three, is not a magic number.

By way of further example lets take three random things and see if they combine together to create a result that could in anyway be described as happy or ‘magic’. The three things are; the internet, a credit card and extreme stupidity, the place is this very office, the time last Friday afternoon. No good can come of this.

It all started innocuously enough with an early breakfast, a large cup of tea and a copy of the Times. Somewhere in the inside pages was an article that caught my attention, The Rolling Stones, I learnt, were to play a concert for 2 million people on Copacabana beach Rio De Janeiro on Saturday. I don’t know about you but that sounds like just the sort of thing to really make a weekend go with a swing. So I have a look on the internet, just out of curiosity you know, to see how much tickets to Rio are and if it would be theoretically possible to get there, see the gig and be back in time for work on Monday morning. What do you know? It is possible but the ticket would be quite hugely expensive. I ummed a bit and then ahhed a bit and decided against it, it’s not really the kind of abuse my credit card can take. Then I changed my mind, that’s the kind of party that will never be repeated; I would rather leave this world with an empty pocket and a head full of memories than a full pocket and no memories.

The tickets were gone, I couldn’t believe it. Trawling the internet provided no further leads and I was quite down cast, not even free hot chocolate raised my mood. I had been so close to going to party on Copacabana with the Stones live in concert. Half heartedly I kept checking the BA web site just in case there was a cancellation. Over and over I entered in the details of the flight I wanted and over and over it said the flight was not available; until one time. There was a space! Suddenly I was faced with a dilemma, I could go but I really couldn’t afford it. I teased myself by filling in all my credit card details and then left it. I was but one click of the mouse away from going to Rio to attend the biggest party in History. I turned to Mark and asked him what I should do, “get me a T shirt”. I closed my eyes pressed OK and Mark looked at me grinned, pointed and said “Your going to Rio”. I skipped around the Office a little a huge grin on my face. Bring it on!

Or it would have been bring it on had I not accidentally booked a flight in March. Apparently I can move the dates but there were no flights left for Friday. So I am now the proud owner of a return flight to Brazil, curious. I had a look on the internet and it seems as though there are quite a few trees there so I’m quite looking forward to going there for my summer holls. I think the trick will be to go for more than a weekend, I’m thinking I might try to take a month and spend some decent time there once this year in the woods is up. It’s quite odd I can’t remember the last time I went away with more that about 10 days planning.

Three, in my experience is not a magic number, then again maybe it is; I like the idea of digging the hammock out, slinging it between some trees and going surfing.

Friday night I went back to the woods and was in bed by 9pm and over the next 36 hours I slept for 32 so perhaps its best I did not make it to the party. In the four hours that I was up I managed to construct a rudimentary lean-to shelter that I am quite pleased with. Previously I had attached my tarp to the branches of a tree and would have to lie beneath it, precisely where would be dictated by the angle the rain was coming in at. Now I have a fairly sturdy shelter.

More on this later

As for the black eye it went a little like this

I lost my torch.

Then I built a shelter

then I came back home in the dark and was thinking to myself "there is a shelter here now, I best be careful there are all kinds of branches where there didn't used to arrrrrgggghhhh"

I have just been told that I don't have a black eye at all. If you look really carefully you can see some bruising.

There are also the very beginnings of leaves showing on the Hazel trees.

1 comment:

WanderingScribe said...

Three definitely is the magic number, didn't you read my blog;-) Fall sounds nasty. Does it get colder than this? Rio sounds like a good antidote.